The Winter Classic: Where Rivalries Drop F Bombs

Aaaahhh…. You smell that? That’s the smell of cold crisp air you’re smelling. That can mean only one thing.

The NHL Winter Classic.

As HBO premieres 24/7 Flyers/Rangers last night, one can only wonder what the cameras will bring us. A swearing Tortorella?  Feuding fashion tips from Lundqvist and Avery? Shelley taking jabs at little Dubinsky? The world awaited with baited breath.  And here it is…

“Put your foot on the fucking gas…”

Five minutes into the show, I’ve come to the conclusion that the F-Bomb can be inserted into almost any sentence. Good or bad.

I think 24/7 gives fans the ultimate insight into what it’s like behind the scenes.  As a player myself (retired 2001 from a 9 year stint in ice and roller hockey), I find it utterly interesting to see how the pros do it in the locker rooms.  Torts definitely knows how to light a fire.

It opens up with the NYR game against the Leafs. I damn near swooned myself off the couch with a half naked Gaby. Apparently Boyle being mic’d up makes him unable to think too.  Seeing Sauer and DZ’s hits again was painful.  Nothing like re-living a subpar game again, eh?

Then it shifts to the Flyers. Now, I’ll tell you a secret. I have a Flyers jersey. It’s an oldie. Shawn Antoski. Yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking either. I’ve come to the conclusion, that what ever Bryzgalov is drinking I would like a nice big helping of… “solar system is so humungous big…”  I believe his brain probably works similarly to mind. And in that case, the man is pure genius.

Oh, those kids with Boyle. That’s probably how I’d look if I stood next to him.  I love seeing the guys with the kids. And yes Boyle, we all saw you oogling the Rockettes.  Avery is one handsome dude. The camera loves that man.  He sees his trip to The Whale as an obstacle. I’ve noticed his composure about this season is somewhat more mature and respectable.

I’d like to chop Briere’s hair off. Really, I’d do it. He doesn’t scare me.  However, I do miss Jagr’s mullet.  Can we get it back please?  But he needs to stop rocking during his interviews. I started getting seasick.

“Ya gotta take some shots… ya gotta take some shots…”  wise words, from a wise man.

Oh, I’ve been sniped.  Yes, the sniping, er Anisimoving incident. Apparently he was just reloading. I think we can all breathe a sigh of relief now.

Focus again on the Flyers and Laviolette.  The man is dedication itself. Then it focused on Wayne Simmonds and his thoughts on being one of the few African Americans in the NHL.

Now, back to the Rangers…Anisimov describes why he chose that celebration.  In Russia, sniping is tolerated.  Then came the Callahans, and some of the Rangers eating a few tables away.  I like how they decide who pays for dinner.  I may try that next time I’m out. Although since both me and The Hubs have the same credit cards, it’s kind of a moot point, eh?

Best quote of Part 1?  “It’s nothing going around the bushes…” Gaby discussing how abrupt and blunt Torts is.

G’ma Callahan stole the show. Get that woman a TV contract.

And Giroux’s medical check up and Bryzgalov give tips on hunting in China. Long story short: don’t shoot a tiger.  Then the Flyers team party. Baby Bryz should be a backup somewhere.

I could sit here and reiterate the back and forths in depth that this show took, but it’s better to watch it. Words can only describe the emotion that you get watching it.  Makes you proud to be a fan of the greatest sport. Ever.